Do you use the mistakes and bad choices from your past to beat yourself up, or do you use the information to better your life and the lives of those around you?
Everyone makes mistakes.
The real question is "Would you make those same mistakes today?" If the answer is no, then take off the hair shirt and forgive yourself. If you need to make restitution to someone, do it. Then move on.
I'm not asking if you're capable of the same bad deeds. Of course, you are. You've proven that. But you're also capable of NOT doing it, as your life now proves. Remember that.
Beating ourselves up with these horrors doesn't remind us what we're capable of as much as lock us up with an abuser who knows where our soft spots are.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Saturday, October 3, 2009
The pleasure of my company...
I've been doing lots of things that are very uncomfortable for me lately.
Today I got to spend time with myself.
Worrying about free time, up until recently, has been a moot point. My days have been filled to bursting with work and activities for both myself and my family.
Now that my daughter is driving herself around and my husband is working swing-shift, I find myself with more free time than I'm comfortable with.
For here's the truth, while most people relish the idea of a free day, at home, by themselves, I dread it. I feel exposed and vulnerable. And guilty. Like it's somehow wrong to have time to myself.
Today I met my "free time" nemesis head-on. With a 14 hour window of self-improvement opportunity stretching before me, free time and I were going to become buddies. Because, let's face it, I need to learn to appreciate my own company.
So far, I have managed to waste an incredible amount of clock hours in a relatively short span of time. I'm getting things done, but I'm also relaxing. And I'm having fun.
Who knew?
Oh yeah, all of you that tell me how much you look forward to time on your own.
You were right... Happy now?
Today I got to spend time with myself.
Worrying about free time, up until recently, has been a moot point. My days have been filled to bursting with work and activities for both myself and my family.
Now that my daughter is driving herself around and my husband is working swing-shift, I find myself with more free time than I'm comfortable with.
For here's the truth, while most people relish the idea of a free day, at home, by themselves, I dread it. I feel exposed and vulnerable. And guilty. Like it's somehow wrong to have time to myself.
Today I met my "free time" nemesis head-on. With a 14 hour window of self-improvement opportunity stretching before me, free time and I were going to become buddies. Because, let's face it, I need to learn to appreciate my own company.
So far, I have managed to waste an incredible amount of clock hours in a relatively short span of time. I'm getting things done, but I'm also relaxing. And I'm having fun.
Who knew?
Oh yeah, all of you that tell me how much you look forward to time on your own.
You were right... Happy now?
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